“Tension is who you think you should be. Relaxation is who you are.”
Chinese Proverb
What to do With it After I Recognize it?
- The first thing you can do once you become aware of your thoughts and emotions is to RELAX. Take a breath, be present with the thought or emotion, relax into the moment. Too often and especially with anxiety you can develop a tendency to “push it away” or “argue with yourself” about why you feel that way and this creates MORE anxiety in the long run.
- The second thing to do is recognize that what you are aware of in the form of thoughts are nothing but stories you tell yourself. Some of these stories are more closely aligned with reality and some are not, however they are all just stories. This awareness gives you great power in changing their “programming” because you can listen to them just like you would listen to a bedtime story, not arguing with them or trying to understand them, but instead just listening to them.
- After you listen to the stories you are telling yourself you find that many of them once heard don’t accurately represent your current understanding of your reality. For example: you might hear the story “I am a failure,” yet once you hear it you instinctively (wordlessly) become aware that you don’t actually believe that anymore. In these types of stories, once heard the story often “dissolves” on it’s own and the energy it was taking to maintain the story is now yours for the taking.
- If the story “dissolved” on it’s own then simply being present with/allowing yourself to feel the emotion that was tied to it will allow the emotion to also “dissolve” on it’s own and again the energy it was taking to maintain the emotion is also yours for the taking, strengthening your mind and body.
- If you feel like the story you are telling yourself does more accurately represent your current understanding of your reality then the belief system can be “reframed.” For example: you might hear the story “I am afraid of failing this test” and once heard it “sticks around.” When this happens you could “reframe” the thought to “I am actually excited about testing my knowledge.” This is easier said than done and with stories you really believe it can become necessary or atleast very helpful to talk to a mental health specialist of some sort (or sometimes even just a good friend) to help you re-examine the belief system that you are holding onto.
There are many tips and tricks to this process and the more you do it the better at it you become. In future posts I will be offering up some of the tips and tricks that I use in my own practice as well as from other healthcare specialists who will share their tips and tricks as well.
Wishing you amazing joy and all the very best all health,
David
Where To Next?
Build on your understanding of your anxiety in the following post:
- Coming soon…
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